Welcome Christmas

Christmas is my favorite holiday. It is not because of the gifts although that is a part of it.

Christmas is the time when we are all a little nicer, a little friendlier, a little more caring to our fellow human beings. We should be that all year but we are not. And shame on us for that.

I love choosing the gift that is just right for a person I care about. No gift cards for me. I love to see the looks on their faces when they open a gift. It is the best part. Of course I would feel pretty unloved if no one got me a gift but the really important thing is that I got them something they will enjoy.

In my family Mom always cooked a huge meal. She baked and the house was full of warm cookie smells. When I began my own family we still went to my parents 'on Christmas. I always took baked goods of my own to add to Mom's. 

Eventually my little family began to grow and I thought we should spend Christmas day at home. Daddy could not understand that. After all Mom was going to cook. If he had his way none of us would have ever moved away.

When I was a teenager we started our Christmas eve tradition. We had all begun to buy gifts for each other and our parents. We continued that because it was so much fun.

We served cold cuts and cookies. No cooking for Christmas Eve.

Then came the opening of presents to make room for what Santa would leave overnight. Daddy passed out the gifts. The first one went to the youngest person there. That person would open the package and hold the present up for everyone to see. 

After that the next youngest did the same. We went through each member of the family until each of us had opened and displayed a gift. Then Daddy just passed out a gift. Whoever opened it had to hold it up for all to see.

It took all evening. It was so much fun. A big deal was made of each gift. We all went home happy and tired.

After my parents died we each continued the tradition with our families. I added one feature. I made little goody bags for each of the children. It gave them something to do before everyone was there and we were ready for the major event. I filled them with kazoos, Chinese finger traps, candy necklaces, ring pops, little tops, small puzzles...that sort of thing. Sometimes I think they looked forward to those more than the gifts.

So have a Merry Christmas and make it last.

Christmas Eve

  I am sharing a post from 2018. I hope you enjoy it.

***********************************************

When we were little Christmas was an expectant time. We went to bed early so that Santa Claus could come and leave us presents. We had written letters to him assuring him that we had been good. We let him know what gifts we wanted.

It was so hard to go to sleep. We would try and the harder we tried, the harder it was to relax enough to finally drop off. But eventually it happened.

Christmas morning was glorious. We would get up and file to the living room. That is where the Christmas tree was with all the presents beneath it. There was an order to opening gifts that has been followed from then on. I will tell you more later.

Some Christmases we went to spend the day with my mother's family on the farm. It was fun getting so many people together. But most years it was just our family and that was special.

One Christmas when I was 5 or 6 I awoke to hear the sounds of nuts cracking. That was Daddy. I cannot pass the nuts in the store at Christmas without thinking of him. He loved them so and Christmas was the only time they were available.

There were voices. Had Santa been there?

I got out of bed and went quietly to the door. There were Mom and Daddy wrapping gifts and putting them under the tree. Most people would say that was proof there is no Santa Claus. Of course I know better. He is real.

Every year Santa left a giant Hershey bar for each of my brothers and sisters. Mom and I got big boxes of chocolate covered cherries. They are still my very favorite.

Another year my brother and I woke up early. It was about 2:00 in the morning. We went to the living room and there was the tree with all the presents under it. We were much too excited to go back to bed so we decided to wait quietly until everyone else was awake.

We spent the time guessing what was in each package. The round one had to be a basketball. It was fun. The problem was that even our whispering got louder and louder. Mom got up and shooed us back to bed.

Then there was the year my brother and I decided to play sick and stay home from school before Christmas. We knew where Mom was stashing the gifts and we were going to take a peek. Mom was working at the time so she took our youngest sister to Grandma's. We were alone. Yay.

We went into the closet and went through everything. I found two dresses that I assumed were for my sister and me. Mom sewed most of our clothes. She had outdone herself with these and they were gorgeous. I even tried mine on. Perfect fit.

That was a terrible Christmas for me. I discovered that a major part of the fun is the expectation and surprise in the packages.

When I was about 15 I went to my boyfriend's house on Christmas Eve. I had a wonderful time with his family. He was to take me home so I would be home by 11:00.

There was a terrible blizzard that night. I lived at what amounts to be the top of a steep hill. He drove home the way we usually went. His car could not get to the top of the hill. He tried another way. No luck. We went around and tried to get up the hill past the cemetery. It was steeper than the rest.

Then we decided that perhaps he could go part way up and then turn into a subdivision. By winding through streets that only went up for a block we were finally able to come out on my street and I made it home. He had no trouble going to his house because it was all downhill.

Because it was so late I went to explain to Mom why I did not make curfew. She understood. She was wrapping gifts for my brothers and sisters and told me I could help so that she could get a little sleep. I was happy to do it.

Then the next morning we opened our gifts from Santa. I was miserable because I knew everything the other kids were getting. I do like surprises.

As we got older the kids started buying gifts for our parents and each other. In order to make room under the tree we opened those gifts on Christmas Eve.

When I was a teenager I realized how much my parents loved Christmas and what they did to make sure that our Christmas was a good one. We did not get gifts for birthdays and other occasions. There were special things we did but money was hard to come by.

At Christmas my parents went all out. They would go into debt or sell something that was precious to them just to make sure that our Christmas was a good one. And they never ever let on. I knew but I never mentioned it to them. That was my gift to them.

One year I got my first wristwatch for Christmas. I was being recognized as the soon to be adult that I felt I was. It was before we had digital battery-operated watches. It had to be wound by the little stem to keep it running every day. No problem.

The problem was that it felt hot. I told my parents but they just chuckled and told me that I would get used to the feeling of wearing it soon. I kept complaining and they kept being amused.

Then one day I showed them the blister on my arm where the watch had burned it. They took it back to the store. It seems that the watchmaker had not put in that teeny tiny drop of lubricant that keeps the gears from creating the friction that eventually caused my burn.

As we got older and began having families of our own we still tended to go to Mom and Dad's for Christmas Day. Mom always told us she was cooking and we were all welcome. Just don't get between her and the television during the football game.

Daddy never understood why any of us moved into our own homes, much less why we would want to spend Christmas Day at home. As my family got older I wanted my children to develop happy memories of our Christmases like the ones I had. So we began to spend Christmas Day at our house. Daddy did not understand.

Now Mom understood about Christmas Day. However she had a strict rule about Christmas Eve. Everyone in the family was required to be there, no matter what.

We had baked goods, candy, cakes, and pies. One year she even decided to make every fruit cake from the recipes she had been collecting for decades. I always took some of the things I had made. There were cold cuts and chips, pickles and relishes, vegetable trays... all easy to eat and no work at the time.

We all sat and talked and laughed. The kids played and told the adults what had been happening in their little lives. Daddy just sat in his chair and reveled in having his family around him. Mom even was able to enjoy herself because all the work was done for a time and she could join in without interruption.

We are a large family. We were not blessed with those soft genteel voices. As we talked the noise level would rise. So we talked louder. The noise level would keep rising and we would keep talking louder. To new members of the family it was disconcerting but they would learn to adjust.

Then came time to open the gifts. We all took our gifts to each other to Christmas Eve. Christmas morning was reserved for Santa Claus.

Daddy played Santa. He did not dress up or anything. He was the person who passed out the gifts. The first gift always went to the youngest member of the family. We would all watch as the gift was opened then ooh and aah at the gift. Then the next in line would receive the next gift and the same oohs and aahs were issued.

After each person in the family had received a gift in the order of their age and the appropriate responses were given, the gifts were not necessarily given in order. But each gift received the same presentation... we watched as it was opened and then appreciated the wonderfulness of it.

As I said we are a large family and there were a lot of gifts. Gift opening took a long, long time. We loved every second.

I miss those huge Christmas Eves. Mom and Daddy are gone. Some of the children are no longer with us. There have been divorces and marriages that have changed who is a present member of the family. Two of my brothers, one of my sisters, and a nephew and niece have died. But the spirit of Christmas lives.

I tried to keep the big Christmas Eve celebration going. But people would move too far away so they could not come. Soon it was just my children and grandchildren. There were still enough of us to have a raucous, noisy party.

Now I have moved away. I came back to the part of the country where I was raised and away from the big city that I hated. My children and grandchildren had to stay where their jobs are. My Christmases are quiet now. But I have all those happy memories and they are more than enough.

By the way, for any who doubt, Santa Claus is real. He still leaves presents (and chocolate covered cherries) for me under my tree.

Road Trip

Mom and I went on a driving trip. She had always wanted to see New England. I took some time off work and away we went.

We went from Detroit across the Ambassador Bridge into Canada. It is a shorter drive to New York that way.

We entered New York by Niagara Falls. It is one of my favorite places. We stopped and watched the water fall for quite some time.

As we drove through New England we stopped at places of interest. We both bought lots of souvenirs. I love tourist traps. Cheap merchandise that costs too much. Heaven.

As we drove through the Adirondack Mountains I saw colors there are not even names for. It was early autumn and the leaves were turning in the most exquisite hues.

We drove through every state of New England. We stopped when we saw something of interest.

When we returned to New York state we stopped on Cooperstown. We were both baseball fans. Memorabilia from baseball for a century was there.

The most astounding thing I saw was two statues. They were carved from wood but looked so real. The clothing even looked like it was blowing in a soft breeze.

We also went to Seneca Falls to see the Women's Hall of Fame. Learning about all those women was fascinating.

Our trip ended in Kentucky where my sister was living. It was one of my favorite trips.

Robbery

When my husband had the junk yard there was a family of men who worked for him. After he no longer had the yard they worked off and on for some of the other junkyards in the area. 

They were all fairly young men with young families. All of them except a cousin who was older with a wife and no children.

I began to manage one yard of three that a friend owned. One of that family worked for me. He was a good worker and I could depend on him.

Our family moved to another state and we lost touch. I did get newspapers from the other state however.

One day I read some upsetting news. It concerned the family who had worked for us.

The young man who had worked for me and the older cousin were working for a yard in a bad area of Detroit.

Someone entered the yard intending to rob it. They shot the young man and killed him. They also shot the older cousin and I do not know what his condition was.

But the tragedy does not stop there. Someone called the other young man. He was the older brother of the young man who died,

He immediately got ready to go to his brother. As he frantically ran out his front door he suffered a heart attack. He died right away.

They left 6 young children to grow up without their fathers. 

Walnut Chews

My mother was an extremely generous and giving person. She was creative and talented. What I am about to tell you will surprise you. It certainly surprised her children.

When I was a teenager she found a recipe in a woman's magazine. Mom thought it looked good enough to try. She made them at Christmas that year. They were good but nothing to write home about.

The next year Mom made them again with a few slight changes. They were better.

Each year Mom would tweak her recipe a bit. It took a few years before she got the perfect bar cookies. They were a family favorite.

They are called walnut chews. You can find recipes for walnut chews on the internet. They are not the same nor are they even close to as good.

Mom's recipe had a sort of short bread layer covered by chewy filling and topped with walnuts. The bars are very rich and you cannot eat too many.

When we would ask her how to make them she would shrug her shoulders and say that she just put in a bit of this and that. I understand a bit of this and that but I do not have a clue about what the ingredients are.

One year while Mom was making the walnut chews my sister saw the recipe laying on the book of recipes. My sister leaned over to peak at it and Mom slammed the recipe book shut!

As I said Mom was generous. She taught all her children to cook. But she would not share that recipe.

After Mom died my sister and I were going through her things. When we came across that recipe book we looked for the walnut chews recipe. Not there. We never found it. Mom took it with her I guess.

I have tried many times to make anything that comes close to walnut chews. I have not been successful.

You Are Out!

For part of the school year there were 6 girls in my grade. One of the girl's parents were divorced. She spent 6 months with one parent and the other 6 months with the other. We were in the second grade. 

As I look back at that time I wonder about the dynamics of it. Always two of us were "out". We were not included in any games. we were not allowed to sit with them. We were completely shunned. It was horrible to be one of the two. And it hurt our feelings.

Then suddenly we would be welcomed into the group. Two different girls were "out".  We were just as cruel as they had previously been to us.

It was not the same girls any of the times. We each had our turns on both sides. And believe it or not other than this behavior we were all nice girls. Why did we do this?

Cooking On The Ceiling

I learned to cook when I was very young. It was the way little girls were brought up then. That was when there were not mixes for anything. Everything was made from scratch.

I learned that a teaspoon of something would fit in a little cup made of the palm of my hand. A tablespoon of something is larger spot of my hand. I often cook using a bit of this and a bunch of that. It is easier than making a dirty measuring cup.

My mother and I cooked together often. And there were times I did the cooking for the family. Mom was often tired because of taking care of babies. I enjoyed it.

After I was older I began to teach my children to cook. I had a sister-in-law who was raised in an Indian school. She could cook a few very basic things. She asked me how to cook a few more things. Of course I was happy to oblige.

Her oldest daughter wanted to learn how to make home-made biscuits. She and I always had such fun together. Making biscuits was no different. 

We were serious cooks and biscuits are easy. Somehow we ended up making a huge mess. Easy enough to clean up... until I noticed that somehow the ceiling was covered with flour. 

Now we had not been throwing flour. We had not done anything to put flour on the ceiling but there it was.

Here Chick Chick Chick

My nephew loved his chickens. He fed and watered them. He was a good chicken owner.

There was one ever so small problem. He was the only one who could see them.

When we would all go to the mall we usually met at a little restaurant there for a quick lunch before we went home.

My nephew would seat himself and pull his chickens from his pocket. Then he would sprinkle salt from the shaker onto the table. He would open a small container of coffee creamer. His chickens had food and water. 

We always left a good tip. We still worried about the extra mess waitresses had to clean after he gathered his chickens to take them home. They said they did not mind because they enjoyed the chickens too.

The restaurant also had a nice children's dessert. It was a dish containing one scoop of ice cream, candies to make a clown face, and an ice cream cone for a hat.

My nephew cried because he would not eat a clown. The waitresses had learned this so they served all the ingredients in separate dishes. He happily ate it all that way.

But what happened to the chickens?

One day while playing in my mother's back yard my nephew decided to show the chickens to his cousin (my niece). She looked at them with interest. Suddenly she snatched them and noisily ate them all!

His chickens were gone. I guess he did not want to take a chance with new ones.

Temper, Temper

As long as I remember my mother taught us not to fight. She was like all mothers... no fighting means less chance of an injured child.

Of course there were still fights. Brothers against brothers, sisters against sisters, and brothers against sisters. We were normal children after all. 

At times there were confrontations with other children. Someone would say or do something that would tick off the other. It happens.

Mom used those times to teach us. Instead of saying, "Use your words," she would tell us that "When you lose your temper you have lost control of the situation." Think about it. Even in a fist fight the person who is wildly swinging out of anger will probably get a black eye from a single punch from a person in control.

Even in a debate it will be the person who keeps a cool head who will win. They are in control.

The older I get the more wisdom I see in my mother's teachings. I tried to teach my children the same lesson. Their grandmother also told them the same.

The idea does necessarily work at first. My children also had a hot-headed father. However they now try to teach their children and grandchildren to not lose their tempers. The lesson took.

Now this does not mean you must abandon your feelings. You can still defend yourself if need be. It simply means you can be in control of the situation. 

Remember if you lose your temper you lose control.

Switch

My 10-year-old niece was diagnosed with a thyroid problem. She was growing too quickly. There were other problems also. Her mother took her to the doctor and after testing her thyroid was the culprit.

As doctors always do they tried a variety of treatments. None were working.

Finally they decided to try radiation. She did not have check into the hospital. I believe she took pills.

They were told that she should not be around any babies or to sit close to anyone for more than a minute or so. Of course everyone had a good time teasing her about having "cooties".

The really funny part is that every time she would walk past the television the channels would change. They had a lot of fun having her walk back and forth to see what shows would come on.

There is a happy ending. Her medical condition is fine. She stopped growing. She is a bit taller than her sisters but her father is quite tall.

Lights On

My daughter-in-law and I were sitting on her front steps. It was a pleasant summer evening.

We were just talking about day-to-day nothings as we watched the kids playing.  My sons were all working on a car belonging to one of them.

Suddenly all three of my boys stopped what they were doing. They closed the hood of the car and put all their tools away. They looked almost like zombies as they made their way up the steps and into the house.

My daughter-in-law and I watched as they silently walked past us and into the house. We knew the car was not yet fixed. What on earth?

Then I began to laugh. The streetlights had just turned on. I taught my children when they were small that they were to come inside when the streetlights came on. It was a habit that stayed with them.

A Little Off The Side

I used to take my boys to the barber college to get their hair cut. The students who cut the hair were similar to a resident in the hospital. They had completed their studies and needed experience. There were experienced barbers on the floor with them in case of problems.

One time my youngest son was sitting politely in his chair. Suddenly he yelled. His barber clipped a little chunk out of his ear! 

His haircut was free that day.

By the time he was due for another cut he was willing to try again. He sat quietly in his chair again. And once more he was injured. 

This time there were no pieces of his ear missing. He did have a small scraping type of cut. Another free haircut.

My son was really angry at the two men who had cut him. He said he would never go back.

The fact was that another haircut day came.

As we walked into the barber college my son declared that he wanted a woman barber. Since the injuries came from men barbers he thought a woman might be more careful.

He was right. No injuries that day. He insisted on a woman every time after that.

Memorize

My second-grade teacher recognized that I had a good memory. She encouraged me to develop my memory by giving me things to memorize.

Several times during the school year there was a program presented to the parents and anyone else who wished to attend. It was not a large school and every class was expected to have an offering. It might be a song, or dance, or short play,

As I said it was a small town. For some reason there were more boys than girls attending classes. If one classroom needed girls to fill in for their portion of the program girls were recruited from another room. We had so much fun.

Another fun thing was that I was always given poems to recite. I memorized poems like The Song of Hiawatha, Paul Revere's Ride, The Owl and the Pussycat, The Gingham Dog and the Calico Cat, and Little Orphant Annie. Mom also had me memorize The Raven. She was a big fan of alliteration. All of these are fun poems for many reasons. 

Imagine my delight when I learned that my oldest niece was learning Little Ophant Annie in school. 

These are all great poems to read to children. Although you may want to consider the age of your child for Little Orphant Annie. It is just a bit scary.

The Origin Of The Jack-O'-Lantern

 Halloween is coming. I am reposting the story of the origin of the Jack-o-lantern. Please enjoy it.

Stingy Jack was well known around his part of Ireland. He liked his drink and was thought to take liberties with other people's property. He cheated, deceived, and misused anyone he could. Stingy Jack did not particularly care what others thought of him. All that mattered to Stingy Jack was Stingy Jack and his comforts.

Now the devil had been keeping tabs on him. Stingy Jack was a prime candidate for the devil's domain.

One night after a night of heavy drinking, Stingy Jack was stumbling home. He came upon a body lying in the road so he stopped to see if there was anything of value in the pockets.

Suddenly the body moved and jumped up. Stingy Jack realized that it was the devil. Jack's earthly time was to end. But he was not ready to go.

Stingy Jack asked for a last wish. The devil saw no harm in granting a final drink to Stingy Jack. Off they went to the pub. Stingy Jack was a frequent patron and knew the bartender well. As the duo walked through the door the bartender smiled. When Stingy Jack got the best of somebody, the bartender got a nice part of the take.

Stingy Jack proceeded to have a sample or more of every type of drink in the pub. When he finished he told the devil to turn himself into a silver coin to pay the tab. He promised that he would get the coin back so the devil could change back into himself.

The devil turned himself into a coin of silver. Stingy Jack grinned at the bartender who grinned right back. Stingy Jack dropped the coin into his pocket which just happened to also contain a crucifix. The crucifix took away all of the powers the devil had. He begged and begged to be set free.

Stingy Jack, being the kind-hearted soul he was, said he would set the devil free IF the devil would promise not to take his soul for 10 years. Of course the devil agreed.

Ten years passed with Stingy Jack continuing in his evil ways. The devil appeared as he said he would. Stingy Jack knew his time was up. The devil had Stingy Jack by the arm ready to take him to Hell. Stingy Jack asked if the devil would climb the apple tree they were standing next to and pick an apple for him to eat on the way. The devil heaved a heavy sigh and climbed the tree.

While the devil was picking a nice apple Stingy Jack hurriedly surrounded the tree trunk with crucifixes. The devil was stuck in the tree.

Once again the devil found himself pleading for his freedom. Finally Stingy Jack made the devil promise to never take his soul. The devil begrudgingly promised. Stingy Jack took the crosses and happily went home knowing that he had outsmarted the devil.

Stingy Jack continued his evil ways but eventually he died as everyone does. He sat and waited patiently for his turn to enter Heaven. When he approached the gates he was turned away. He was told that he was far too evil to be in Heaven.

With resignation Stingy Jack went to Hell. He knocked on the gates and the devil met him there. The devil reminded Stingy Jack of their agreement and told him that since he could not have the soul there was no place for him in Hell. He was doomed to wander in nothingness for eternity.

It was Stingy Jack's turn to plead. Eventually the devil agreed to give him an ember to light his way through the darkness. Jack placed it in a hollowed turnip or rutabaga to keep from burning his fingers.

Stingy Jack came to be called Jack Of The Lantern or Jack-O'-Lantern. At certain times of the year, such as Halloween, when the world of the dead is close to the living Jack-O'-Lantern is seen wandering.

In Ireland during Halloween the living tried to make sure the dead cannot cross back. They began leaving meals on their doorsteps to keep mischief away. If they had to be out in the night they would wear masks and costumes to fool the spirits so that they would not be molested.

Carved pumpkins called Jack-O'-Lanterns are placed on the doorstep to remind spirits of Jack-O'-Lantern and his plight. They do not want to be caught in between the worlds of the afterlife so they avoid any house that is protected by the Jack-O'-Lantern. 

Becky And The BB Gun

One year for Christmas two of my brothers received BB guns. In the 1950's it was almost a rite of passage for boys to get a gun of their own.

The boys drew targets on the corrugated fence in the chicken yard. They proceeded to take target practice. We could hear the ping ping of the bb's. 

At the time my sister was about 4 years old. Somehow the boys talked her into standing at the fence. She was wearing a little sunsuit like little girls used to wear. 

The boys began shooting at her!

She turned so her back was to them but she was not moving away. I do not know whether she was afraid to move or if they told her she had to stay. Either way they kept shooting.

Of course when we found her she was crying in pain. She had several bb's stuck just under the skin of her back. Mom removed them with tweezers. She recovered quickly.

Of course the boys were punished. And their guns were taken away until they were more mature.

It is only one of the reasons that I do not give weapons as gifts.

Where Are We?

We were looking for the place we wanted to be. We were not finding it and ended up not knowing where we were. My sister-in-law was close to hysteria. The rest of us just laughed. Mom was driving.

Now is the time to tell you that my mother easily got lost. It had been happening my whole life. She had absolutely no sense of direction. She said that she could be driving down a familiar road and all of a sudden the road "picked itself up and was going another direction."

As children we gave it no thought. We did not know that not everyone got lost sometimes. We looked at it as an adventure. We never knew what we would see.

To become not lost Mom would just keep driving. She felt she would find someplace she knew and would find her way then.

As I said we all thought it was a great adventure. I am certain it taught me not to panic, to enjoy the unexpected, and that things always work out.

So my poor sister-in-law was extremely upset. However when we found Gratiot Avenue even she had a good laugh.

Picture For The Teacher

 

I have told you before what a wonder my mother was. When I was a child I thought all mothers were as talented.

One year for Christmas at school each of us gave our teacher three little cakes. Mom had been saving 15- ounce vegetable cans. 

We each thoroughly scrubbed three cans inside and out. There was not a trace of what was inside the can nor was there a trace of the label or anything else on the outside. Then we completely greased the inside of each can. We set the cans standing up on a cookie sheet.

Mom made the cake batter. Can you imagine the mess if each of us made our own batter? She poured batter into one can of each group. Three different kinds of batter - white, chocolate, and spice. Into the oven they went.

After they baked and cooled Mom carefully removed the cakes from their cans onto a nice piece pf aluminum foil. We carefully rolled our cakes to look like little silvery logs. We twisted the ends much like a Tootsie Roll is twisted at the ends. A sweet little ribbon bow at each end our gifts for our teachers was wrapped. and ready for the school Christmas party.

We are not Native American. Along with family stories our DNA confirms it. However for much of her early life Mom lived on or near Reservations. Often she would be invited to school to tell about the way the Indians lived. She would answer questions too.

Mom taught herself to draw with help from John Nagy on television. She was so artistic. She learned how to make copies of pictures by making grids. She only did that for portraits. Everything else was freehand.

As you might have guessed she decided to give each of our teachers a charcoal portrait of themself. Mom used the school pictures our teachers gave us earlier in the year. she made a grid of small squares. On the 20x30 paper she drew the same number of squares only proportionately larger.

Naturally they turned out great. Each of our teachers received a portrait for Christmas that year.

 

Wonderful Neighbor

Neighbors are interesting creatures. Some are good, some are bad, and some are merely tolerable. I have had samples of all. Rather than give recognition to bad neighbors I will concentrate on some good ones.

My ex-husband was dying. He had cancer. His neighbor worked the night shift. Every morning when he got home from work he would stop in to check on his friend. He was the truest friend my husband had.

My oldest son was taking care of his father and the neighbor was nice to him too. My son was grateful that he was able to be with his father in his final days.

The neighbor was with my husband when he died. What a good friend.

I now live with my son in his father's house. The neighbor is still a caring neighbor.

My favorite neighbor lived at the end of our street in Tennessee. I was a woman in my middle twenties. I had two small children plus two babies. My husband was a truck driver so he was gone all week.

Our next door neighbor was this woman's daughter. She had a son the same age as my second son. In fact they had the same blonde hair and they were the same size. The woman at the end of the street took care of her grandson while her daughter worked in another town all week and some weekends

The woman had two older children still in school. Every morning when I drove my oldest son to school I also gave then a ride. When we got home my second son and the grandson ran down to the grandmother's house.

Every night for supper she made fresh cornbread. The boys had that for breakfast. They especially liked it when she made cracklin' bread. That is cornbread with pork cracklins' (sold as pork rinds) mixed in.

All the kids usually played at our house. I did not mind the noise. Or the mess. Several times when it was getting late the woman would come up and knock on the door. When my son would answer she would grab him and be halfway home before realizing she had the wrong child.

Often in early afternoon she would come to me and ask if she could take one of the babies for a while. She said she missed having a baby in the house. She took comfort from having a baby present. Even if it was only for a nap.

She was a wonderful and giving person. She gave me a bit of a break when I really needed one. I miss her even today.

I Am So Old That...

 I am so old that I:

remember when they added One Nation Under God to the Pledge of Allegiance

remember when they removed One Nation Under God from the Pledge of Allegiance

remember washing clothes with a wringer washer then hanging them out to dry on the clothesline

remember hula hoops being a new big thing

loved to climb a tree

remember can openers that were not much more than a pointed knife

remember that an electric mixer was a luxury

remember when girls had to wear dresses to school

remember volunteer fire departments

remember having only one television channel that went off the air at midnight

remember Sunday dinner

remember 3cent postage stamps

remember Steve Allen had both the early morning show and the late night show

remember Your Show of Shows

remember needing a bottle opener to open a bottle of pop

remember Your Hit Parade

remember the first show of Captain Kangaroo

remember Howdy Doody

remember pen pals

remember stirring and stirring fudge to make it firm

remember "church keys" that opened bottles and cans

remember going barefoot all summer

and so much more. What do you remember?

Going To Visit Grandma

I was 5 years old. My second brother was 3. We decided one day that we wanted to go visit Grandma on the farm. We asked our mother if we could go.

Of course she said no. But I argued that I knew the way. I suppose she thought it was too far to walk. It eas several miles from the town we lived in.

Finally we asked if we could go to the church to play. It was a block away. We played on the steps and played on the railing of the steps. Flipping over the bar was great fun. Skinning the cat was my favorite trick on the bar.

In reality we had no plans of staying at the church. We went there then turned and walked to Main Street. From there we started to walk to the farm.

Mom was at home with no car. She had my other brother and my baby sister who could not be left alone. Mom was frantic with worry when we did not come home.

She had to wait until Daddy got home from work. She had no choice.

Daddy immediately started to look for us. He had an idea that maybe we were trying to go to see Grandma.

When he found us we were near the edge of town... the same end we lived. I do not know how long we had been gone. It was probably several hours.

As he pulled us into the car he gave each of us a swat on the bottom. Our parents had been that scared both for themselves and for us.

Agree To Disagree

 There is not a person in the whole world whom I agree with completely. I do not hate them for having other opinions. They are entitled to their own thoughts. As long as they are not hurting someone they can believe as they wish.

As much as I loved my parents I did not always agree with them. I love all my children and grandchildren. I do not always agree with them. I still love them.

This is an election year in the United States. We will choose who will be our president for the next four years.

Not everyone in my family agrees with my choice. I do not agree with all. Part of us will vote one way and part the other. We still love each other.

I love a good political discussion. I might learn something or I might impart some facts to someone else. However I will not argue about it. If feelings become heated I stop the conversation. 

I do encourage US citizens to vote. We are hiring employees to run our government. These are important jobs.

Pay It Forward

Have you done it?  When driving at the drive-through at a fast-food restaurant do you pay for the person behind you in line?

I have done it a few times. If I have a little extra money that is.

I ask at the window as I am paying for my order how much the order for the car behind me will cost. It is usually inexpensive so I pay for theirs too.

I feel good when I do it. I always hope they keep it going for a while.

Where is Juan Valdez?

 I do not like coffee. It smells so good but all I can taste is better and oily. 

Coffee drinkers abound in my family. I remember my father's mother always drinking coffee, She poured the coffee from her stove-top percolator into her cup. Then she added a dollop of milk from her can of evaporated milk. Then a generous teaspoonful of sugar from her sugar bowl. After a vigorous stirring she enjoyed it with a cigarette. 

Mom would have a cup of coffee in the morning with Daddy. She would have another in the evening with him. That is all the coffee she drank.

When they were younger they also put milk and sugar in their coffee. Eventually both of them drank it black.

Among the seven of us siblings some were coffee drinkers and some are not. The same goes for our children.

I left Daddy for last. He loved his coffee. He drank it in the morning before he went to work. He drank it all day at work. Then he drank a lot if coffee at home.

Mom got tired of making several pots of coffee every night. One day she got the idea of buying a large 32 cup coffee pot. She made 32 cups of coffee every morning.

I already told you that Mom drank 2 cups of coffee each day. Daddy drank the rest. 30 cups of coffee a day! And that was only at home. I have no idea how much he drank at work.

I have no idea how a person can consume that much liquid a day.

Night Cometh

My front door looks directly west. I enjoy looking out a door or window at the weather. 

I watch sunny mornings when the animals are more likely to be sneaking around. Later a neighbor might mow the lawn or do small repairs on his house. 

Rain is my favorite weather. Watching the drops fall and hearing the drumming noise they make is soothing. I can see the air being so clean and clear.

In the spring I get to watch the trees bud then leaf. Some of them have pretty flowers. Dandelions begin to bloom in the grass. Shortly after that the violets show up. Lilacs bloom on their bushes. The whole world is waking up.

Snow is so pretty. In the winter the world is covered with snow. The weather is cold. A good book, a grilled cheese sandwich, a cup of tomato soup, and a warm blanket make a nice afternoon by the window.

Looking at the stars at night is a real treat. I lived in the big city for so many years and not seeing many stars that I forgot how glorious the night sky is.

Recently I was looking at the western sky through my front door. The sky was turning dark as night approached. There was a dark line almost straight across the sky. I could actually see night approaching. It was fascinating.

Success

I did not plan well for my advancing age. I do have a small pension and I receive Social Security payments. I live with my son so my life is much easier than it probably should be.

I worked and paid into both. There are those who believe these are "entitlements" and feel that I am "taking money from the government".  I began working and having deductions taken from my paycheck when I was 11 years old. I worked for 51 years. Yes these are entitlements because I am entitled to be repaid for the money I allowed the government to use for 51 years. But I digress.

One day I was lamenting the fact that I had not made better choices in my life. I really had nothing to show for all the work I had done. I was not a success.

I must confess that money means very little to me. You cannot wear it, eat it, live in it... you get the idea. I do understand that money helps to get those things. It is just that I do not need fancy. All my needs are basic.

I was a pretty child. I was intelligent. Most of all I was loved. I would say it is a good combination.

As a child I dreamed the fanciful dreams many children dream. I was going to be part of a singing group like the Lennon Sisters. Or a movie star like Hayley Mills. Or write a great detective story.

I also knew those dreams were not realistic. I could not sing. I enjoyed acting at school but that sort of thing is as much luck as anything else. I can write bit I have found that I am not a disciplined writer. 

My son asked me what I had always wanted to be. 

My answer was immediate. I had always wanted to be a mother. 

I never dreamt of a husband but I knew I would need one in order to have children.

 Eventually I married. I had four beautiful babies. 

I have loved being a mother. My children are so much alike and yet so different. 

And now they are all grown. I am so proud of each of them.

My son simply said, "Then you are a success."

Go To Work

My final job before I retired was as a laser operator. I worked in a factory that makes industrial shocks. 

We made shocks for carnival-type rides in amusement parks. We even made the shocks for Batman's cape in movies. They were used to make his cape stiff when he used it.

Our shocks raged from less than an inch long to about ten feet. All shocks less than three feet were lasered to print the company name, the size of the shock, and the type of shock. That was my job.

I worked in a room all by myself. People asked how I could work in there all alone all day. I loved it. Not even my boss could enter unless I allowed it. 

I tried to stay at least one run ahead of each of the departments I serviced. That way everyone had work to do.

Occasionally my machine would need servicing or even break down. Usually it only took a few hours to take care of the problem. One time it would be days before they could get the part needed to fix it.

We had a large order that was time sensitive. The manager of the company made arrangements for the use of another company to allow the use of their laser.

They wanted to send one of our engineers to do the job but he was busy. It had to be done on Saturday so as not to interrupt their business. And they needed someone with a pickup large enough to carry the shocks. I could fill all those requirements so I volunteered.

I drove to another suburb and the other company. The two men who worked there were so welcoming. They gave me a complete tour of their building.

There were approximately thirty work areas. Each had their own machines. Each had a refrigerator. It was kept full of bottled water for the workers of that area. They each had a coffee pot. Each had coffee, creamer, sweeteners, tea, and hot chocolate. They also had a microwave to heat lunches and snacks. 

There was a large patio where they could eat on nice days. They looked out at a small nature preserve the company owned. There were also two large cafeterias when staying inside. Both were equipped with several microwaves and two refrigerators.

There was a nicely kept locker room. Uniforms were supplied by the company. A service took worn ones out of the locker to launder them then returned them to the proper locker. Each locker had a safe for storing valuables and personal items.

A workout room with all the latest workout equipment was large. There were also showers for after exercise or if you just want to be clean at home.

The thing that amazed me the most was the floors. Everywhere I went everything including the shop floors was spotless... no grease and no dirt of any kind. And they used heavy machinery on it.

Then I was told that the company almost went out of business a few decades ago. The employees bought the company. Anyone who works there owns part of the company and are bought out when they leave. 

They have practically no turnover in their workforce. I can see why. 

All this and I was earning overtime!

Let's Take A Ride

My brother-in-law was used to having everything he said and did agreed to by his family. It could be aggravating at times for me. I tried to keep my mouth shut but there were times I just could not.

One day we were visiting his house. My sister-in-law and I were having a pleasant conversation. Then my brother-in-law looked up from the world map he had been studying.

He announced that he was trying to find the best way to drive to Australia. He was thinking of going there for vacation.

I told him there was no way.

He then proceeded to show me how he would drive from Michigan to Alaska. Okay. That can be done. Then see all those little islands? He was certain there were bridges he could drive across. 

I assured him there were not. After a prolonged discussion I allowed that there might be ferries in some cases but certainly not all.

He continued his imaginary drive along the coast of Asia. I asked him how he would handle the problem of passports and visas while passing through so many countries. He said it would be no different than driving to Canada. At that time US citizens did not need a passport to spend a day in Canada.

When he came to the end of Asia I pointed out that would be the end of his driving. No he would continue to drive into Australia.

I showed him the expanse of water on the map that would prevent him from driving any further. There was a bridge! He was adamant. That was when the argument started.

He insisted that he could drive all the way to Australia. I insisted he could not.

After a couple of hours my sister-in-law spoke up which was unusual for her. She told her husband that he knew I would not argue about it unless I knew I was right!

I do not know if he still believes he can drive to Australia. I will not ask in order to prevent another argument. I do know he has not tried. 

Atomic Stew

My father was a Boy Scout Master. His troop met once a week.

The boys learned so many things. Knots were easy for him because he had been in the Navy. They learned the correct way to use sharp instruments like a knife for instance. 

They had a new project every week to learn the skills necessary to earn badges to be sewn onto their uniforms. They also learned lessons that would help them be good people and succeed in life.

Once a year Daddy and his assistant took the boys camping for a week. They were in a nearby state park which is still primitive in places.

For the most part they lived on what nature provided. There is a river there that was good for fishing. They ate very well. 

They practiced archery and other outdoor skills. The boys always had a good time and looked forward to the camping trip all year.

The last night of their week was a special. night. Their meal was special too. Each boy had been instructed to bring a can of food with the label torn off. This was the night they found out what was in them.

There were many cans of vegetables. Each was opened and with much ceremony dumped into the stew pot. A couple of years there would be a can of pork & beans. They went into the pot. One year a well-meaning parent put in a can of pineapple chunks. It went into the pot.

The scoutmaster supplied meat to be roasted separately so unless there was a can with meat in it there was no meat in the pot. 

I know you are wondering how the atomic stew turned out. It was loved by all every time.

Birthdays

My birthday is soon. I will be 77 years old. Some days I feel like my age. Most days I just feel like me and not any age.

I was thinking about the birthdays I had when I was growing up.

We did not get gifts... not enough money. But we did not know the difference so that did not matter

What we did get was the meal of our choice. I always asked for creamed peas and potatoes. That is boiled potatoes with peas in a cream sauce and lots of black pepper. Served with scrambled eggs it is one of my favorite meals.

Mom always baked whatever cake we wanted. I always asked for a devil's food cake with fudge frosting. Mom's fudge frosting was creamy with a thin crust on it. I never can make it right.

Added treat was ice cream. Mom always served Neapolitan ice cream. She said it was because that way everybody got the kind they wanted. I happen to know it was because it was her favorite.

With a large family you would think we celebrated birthdays all year. Not so. All of our birthdays including our parents were within 3 months. Most of those are in a one and a half week period.

My birthdays were wonderful. I hope you have good birthday memories.

Moo

 

In the good old days we had milk delivered to our house. Whole milk. In glass bottles.

It was convenient for Mom to just open the back door in the morning and we had fresh milk for whatever kind of cooked cereal we were having that morning.

In the winter interesting things happened to the bottle of milk. The bottles were covered by a little cardboard circle that fit into a ledge just inside the neck of the bottle.

Sometimes in the winter it was so cold that the milk would freeze. As it froze it expanded. Frozen milk rose above the bottle with the little cardboard cap on top of it. I looked for it often.

When my children were small I also had milk delivery. It was so handy.

I could also place orders for the next delivery. Available were cottage cheese, sour cream, eggs, and several other dairy products. It saved me a lot of trips to the store.

I miss milk delivery. It did make life easier.

I Did It

 I killed my computer. 

It was not premeditated. So I suppose it was a lesser charge of compu-slaughter.

I have never been a graceful person. I trip over my own feet. I fall for no reason at all. I knock things over. It is not only embarrassing but I have to pick up whatever fell or was knocked over.

I was working on the computer one evening last week. I saw something fall from a small table I have by my desk.

When I reached down to pick it up everything was fine. As I sat back up my shoulder caught under the corner of my desk. The desk tilted and my computer fell off.

It landed on its head and has not worked since. My son checked it out and the screen was rapidly scrolling up. It just never got better.

So my new computer arrived today. My son hooked it up and made sure everything was fine. 

I was worried about losing all my family pictures but they are here I cannot find my music but my son seems to think he can find it... later.

I write my blogs several ate a time so there would be no interruption there. I did miss reading the blogs that I read all the time.

Now I am back and you did not even know I was gone.

Misheard Lyrics

I read articles every so often about songs that people hear different words than are actually words in the song. Apparently it has become sort of a game to expose these misheard lyrics.

Probably the most famous of these is Louie Louie. It was written in 1955 as a Jamaican sea shanty. The main problem was that when The Kingsmen sang it they mangled the words. And to be fair there might be a naughty word in there.

Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana is much the same as Louie Louie.

Back in the 50's there was a popular song called Teen Angel. One day when Mom was going to the post office she spotted a little girl sitting on the curb. At the top of her lungs she was singing, "Clean Angel."

On the TV show All In The Family Archie and Edith sat at the piano and sang. So many people wrote in that they could not understand a portion of the song they were singing that they had to record it again. The line was Gee our old LaSalle ran great.

The musical band I worked with accepted requests for music to play and sing. A good friend of mine had a request. She wanted to hear One Spit And Twice Shine. The actual song is Once Bitten Twice Shy.

My aunt swore that it was The Singing Num because nuns do not sing. We argued about that for days.

Imagine my shock when I was walking into the Laundromat to hear the song Where Were You When The Ship Hit The Sand. My dirty little mind heard Where Were You When The Shi* Hit The Fan.

I suppose we are all surprised at times. Has it happened to you?

Put On A Happy Face

Twenty years ago I found out the I had colon cancer. The first doctor had been somewhat reluctant to tell me. He finally just blurted it out.

I was sent to see a surgeon who specialized in that type of cancer. He was more matter of fact and explained possibilities.

For some reason I was not concerned. I knew I was going to be fine. My children and grandchildren were more concerned than I was.

When I called my brothers and sisters to tell them I told them to make sure they were checked for colon cancer. It seems to run in families. So far everyone is good.

The point I am making is that I knew I would be okay. I was able to have a positive attitude.

I had the surgery. They removed all the cancer. I did not need to have chemotherapy or radiation. A positive happy outlook works.

I have read that is the attitude that helps a person recover from illness faster.

To be fair I am basically a happy person. Often I am too naive to worry about anything. It is my nature

When I was diagnosed with breast cancer a couple of years ago I dreaded telling my daughter. She was going through her own horrors with the same disease. She had a much worse type of cancer than I did and suffered so much for too long. She is still suffering.

Again I knew I would be fine. I was. No chemo or radiation.

So try to keep a good attitude if you do not feel well. You will feel better faster.

Down On The Corner

 As everyone must know by now I love music. I do not remember a time when the radio was not playing in our house. 

We listened to all types of music. My father was very fond of the 1812 Overture. Mom liked Cowboy Copas. When Elvis hit the scene I would dance through the house to Rock & Roll.

On TV we watched Spike Jones. That is where my love of silly songs started. We watched Lawrence Welk. I desperately wished I could be a Lennon sister. American Bandstand was seen all over the country... except where I lived. My grandparents did get that program so I could watch when I spent a few days there.

And of course it seemed like every town had at least one aspiring Rock & Roll band. It did not take me long to figure out that the first song every band learned to play was Green Onions. It is an instrumental song by Booker T and the MGS if you want to find it on YouTube.

Of course I had my favorites. I have written about them before so I will let you breathe. But I do want to mention two groups.

The Everly Brothers were from Iowa. Their voices blended so beautifully together. I think Wake Up Little Suzy was the first of their songs I heard. What made them special was that they never had a bad song. Every song they sang was perfect. My favorite is Poor Jenny.

Creedence Clearwater Revival also never had a bad song. They sang about bayous and swamps even though they were from California. Willie And The Poor Boys was not their first hit but it made us feel like we were watching those poor boys on the corner sing and dance to make a bit of money. My favorite somg is It Came Out Of The Sky.

Who do you enjoy listening to?

Do Not Wonder Why I Admire Her

There were 9 children in my husband's family. Three girls and 6 boys. My husband was one of the younger boys. Two of the boys were younger than he was.

The brother next to him in age was just beginning to walk. Suddenly he became very sick. His fever was high. 

As with all families at that time they tried to treat him at home. He only got worse.

They took him to the hospital. The diagnosis was spinal meningitis. The doctors told my other-in-law and father-in-law that he would be dead within two weeks.

He could not eat or drink. He would never walk or talk.

They understood that the family had other children so it was recommended that the baby be placed in a nursing home. The doctors felt it would be easier on the family not to watch him die. And no one was equipped to care for him.

My mother-in-law had other ideas. After much arguing she finally forced them to show her how to put the tube down his throat and into his stomach so she could feed him and give him water. She said that if he was going to die he would die at home surrounded by people who loved him.

Mom fed and bathed him every day. She held him and sang to him. She would make a soft place for him on the floor so he could watch a family of cardinals through the window. If the weather was nice enough she would take him outside for some sun and fresh air.

He lived for years not weeks. He was loved and as comfortable as he could be. It was love that did that for him.

He was becoming a young man. Mom told me that he was beginning to get body hair. She worried she would die before he did and no one could take care of him like she did.

One day my husband said no one woke them up. They went over for breakfast. No one was there. They knew their brother had died. It was their father's birthday.

My Sister Moved

Thank goodness for telephones. They help me stay in touch with those I love. 

I try to stay in touch so I can hear those precious voices.

My youngest sister was my "baby".  She was born when I was 11 years old. I guess my maternal instincts were kicking in.

In large families the older children always help with the younger ones. I was more than willing to help  with my sister. I took everywhere I could. She even went on several dates with me. 

My sister loved being the baby. She was about 8 years old when she decided we could call her a LITTLE girl instead of a baby..

One time my date and I took her to the circus. She even won a prize. (When they went around selling chocolate bars the ones in their pockets had the numbers entitling you to a prize.) We left the circus early because my sister did not feel well. I thought maybe too much candy.

My parents checked her and took her straight to the hospital. Her appendix was ready to burst. An emergency appendectomy fixed her right up. When she came home from the hospital I helped nurse her back to health.

Now my baby sister is retired. She lives with her youngest son and his family. It is a good arrangement.

Recently my nephew got a new job. It pays a lot more. But it meant they had to move to North Carolina from Michigan.

My sister loves it there. She even has a balcony outside her bedroom. Her granddaughters love to play there. 

So I can still talk to her on the phone. And she sends pictures of her new home. What a great invention phones are.

Taking Care Of Mom

 My children take good care of me. And do not think for one second that I am ungrateful. However there are times that they go a bit too far. 

Now I tried really hard take care of their wants and needs when they were little. I like to think I did a good job. I not only love my children but I like them too.

One year my youngest son and his wife decided they wanted to host our Christmas celebration at their house. When I asked what they wanted me to bring they told me, "You always do everything, This time you will do nothing." So we all had a wonderful time and all I had to do was enjoy it.

My daughter was all of 18 years old. She was the manager of a pizza store. She was required to work long hours and often quite late. It was not a bad neighborhood but it was not really a good neighborhood. She was careful as I knew she would be. She never had any problems thank goodness.

One day I mentioned to her that I had a doctor's appointment coming soon. She immediately began to scold me! "Mother you know I have to work that day. I won't be able to take you." I told her that I had been going to the doctor by myself for many years. Then she said in her most imperious voice, " But that is different. I can take care of myself." Kids...

As you know I had a stroke a couple of years ago. I am so fortunate that it was not more serious than it was. My problem was that my taste buds and salivary glands were affected.  Because of that I could not eat. 

When I told the doctors they would tell me things like just eat what you can. Which was nothing. I tried in the beginning. Eventually I gave up. I was eating nothing. My son was thinking of putting me in a home hoping they could get me to eat.

Then one day he had an idea. He bought child sized foods like applesauce, yogurt, and smoothies. Every few hours he would bring me one to choke down. If you notice all of them are wet foods.

I began to feel better. Eventually I would try a piece of toast. Then some scrambled eggs. I now can eat whatever I want.

That was when I realized that I had been dying of starvation. It really was not so bad. I did not desire food at all and I just kept getting weaker and weaker. My son saved my life.

So you can see my children take care of me.

 

The Boy With His Head In A Cloud

One of my brothers is an enigma. There were seven of us. We fell into groups. I was one of the older girls and we were referred to as the girls. The older two boys were the boys. The last two were the kids.   That is only six you say? You are correct. We were the boys, the girls, the kids, and David. (I use that name because it is my favorite name for a boy.)

This does not mean that David was left out of things. It was just a convenient way of referring to us.

David seemed to be in his own little world. He liked to be alone while he was playing. I used to say it was like his head was in a cloud. He loved playing with his cars and trucks. He made elaborate roadways for them. Some were half a block long.

Animals loved him. They let him put his hands in their mouths (ew) and never complained. One day he went up behind the family dog as she was eating. She did not realize he was behind her. When he jumped on her back (as he often did) she turned around and bit him before she was sure what was happening.

David was bitten on both lips. Mom rushed him to the doctor whose office was half a block away. The doctor cleaned him up and recommended that he be taken to another doctor the next town over. Our doctor was quite old and his shaking made it impossible to do jobs that required a steady hand.

The new doctor said that normally wounds like these would require stitches but they tried not to stitch animal bites. He said that in the future David would need plastic surgery to repair the damage. I am happy to say that his lips healed and except for a tiny scar on his upper lip there is nothing to show that it ever happened.

We built a house. It was located on a small hill. There was one house across the street from us and another way up at the end of the street. David loved to ride his sled down the hill in the winter.

One day there was a knock on the door. When Mom answered a man stood there with his hands on David's shoulders. The man was pale with fear.

David had ridden down the hill and into the street just as the man in his pickup truck was driving on the street. David and his sled had gone right under the pickup. The man did not know whether David had been hurt.

David was fine. After a few minutes to collect himself the man went on his way.

It all happened decades ago. David has still not done himself any serious damage. 

White Boy

My sister-in-law died a couple of years ago. There were times we were very close and others when we did not speak. She was always good to my children. I loved her children.

Her mother was American Indian and her father was French. She did not see much of him and little of her mother. She was mostly raised in an Indian boarding school.

She told me that once at a basketball game she gushed over a cute boy on their team. Her older sister explained that he was her brother. She had no idea that she had brothers. She soon found out that she had a large family.

She was close to her two older sisters. She also had three younger sisters. The older two of them had babies the same time as I did. All those babies... But I digress.

When my sister-in-law was still in school she told the nuns she was going to marry a white boy. She met my brother-in-law and fell hopelessly in love. 

Against the wishes of his parents they married and promptly had three children in three years. 

Now my brother-in-law was not always the best husband. For one thing he tended to wander and carry on with other women. My sister-in-law was naturally hurt but she was the best wife she knew how to be. She always forgave him.

Once she went to visit her old boarding school. When she was talking to one of the nuns she told her about her husband. The nun asked her why she ended up marrying a white boy.

When my brother-in-law was in prison she stayed by his side even though he had been wandering before he went in. She found out she had inoperable cancer.

She lived with the knowledge that she was dying. She told me that she had prepared herself to die but she hoped for another year so she would be there when her husband came home.

She was still alive when he came home. I worried that he would carry on with the woman he had been seeing before. Instead he went with her to doctor appointments. He helped her get around. He even went to church with her. He made her last days happy.

All she wanted to be was his wife. In her last days he was finally also her husband.  

Music Appreciation

 My oldest grandson was about three years old. He and I were riding in the car listening to music. Suddenly he laughed heartily. 

He said, "They are saying Hit The Road Jack!" I believe it was the first time he realized the words had meaning.

When he was a few years older the song his parents were listening to went, "Who Let The Dogs Out?" And then my grandson started to bark. His parents looked at him like he had lost his mind. I laughed because I knew the song and it was obvious they did not. 

The first song I sang to each of my grandchildren was The Unicorn. It took three times through the song for my second grandson to fall asleep. 

One day he walked past the radio which was playing The Unicorn. He looked at the radio. Then he looked at me with a puzzled expression on his little face. He looked back and forth several times before I explained that other people sang it too.

Grease is a favorite of all my granddaughters. We have gone to see the movie several times. Usually it was one of them having a special night with Grandma. We have also seen plays and even Grease On Ice. All were special times.

My daughter's daughter was the only person who would go to see The Irish Rovers with me. She was so little that she sat with her little legs completely on the seat. After watching for a few minutes she was in love. She loved the songs and she loved (and understood) the jokes. 

She was actually glowing. I think I enjoyed watching her more than the concert. The man sitting on the other side of her did too. 

After that she and I went every year. 

It has been such fun appreciating music with my grandchildren.

Water Water Everywhere

I am sure many of you have read about the flooding in Iowa. I live about a mile from the Big Sioux River. It is one of the many that are flooding. Actually much of this part Iowa is under water right now. 

Where I live there has been flooding like this before. I live a little higher than flood waters go. I do not worry too much about having to evacuate.

I did notice yesterday that across the highway from us was flooded a bit. Every other place looked dry enough.

My son and I had a quick errand to run yesterday. We needed to cross the bridge over the Big Sioux to go into South Dakota.

As we were crossing the bridge we saw a lot of people taking pictures of the river. It was high but not too high yet. 

We had noticed a lot of water sitting in fields on the Iowa side. That sometimes happens when there has been a lot of rain.

We went on into South Dakota. We took care of our errand and started home. It took about 20 minutes. 

We returned home the same way we had gone. As we were about 1/2 a mile from the bridge water began to trickle across the road.

I looked up and saw that the fields were suddenly full of water. It did not even take a second to happen.

 Now experts tell us not to drive through water on the road. But it was only a trickle and we knew the highway was in good shape. We had just been there. Besides there was not a place to turn around to go back.

In the blink of an eye the highway was covered. Not only was the water rapidly getting deeper but it was filled with pieces of the rows of crops. The crop rows were getting bigger.

We had to keep moving. If we stopped we would be washed away. It felt like we were driving on oversized speed bumps of crops. 

We could no longer see because of the water and debris splashing up as we moved. 

Just as quickly we reached the bridge. It sits higher so there was no water and no debris. What a relief.

We could see that the highway into Iowa was clear. No water at all.

The fields are much lower than the highway there. They were full of water.

We felt safe enough to drive home. We did so with no further incident. They were just blocking the road to the bridge as we turned the corner to go home.

Our vehicle is a Jeep SUV. It was covered from top to bottom with flooding debris. We feel lucky to be here.

Just Say No

Most of us have known people involved in the use of illegal drugs. Most of those people do not have any serious permanent damage. Some are not so lucky.

My sister-in-law was obsessed with being thin for her husband. Her doctor prescribed diet pills. He kept prescribing them even though she was obviously addicted. There were days when she had to sit in a dark room because of those pills. I do not know how she finally stopped those pills after years of taking them but she did.

A good friend from the time he was a teenager started using drugs. He and another friend who was also using came up with a plan to get the money for their drugs. They would stand at an exit to the freeway and beg money when drivers stopped at the red light.

They did very well in the money department. Then they decided on a way to get larger amounts of money from the drivers. They would jump in front of their cars and pretend that they were hit. As long as they did not appear to be injured drivers would give more money so they did not have to contact their insurance companies.

One day our friend jumped in front of a loaded truck. The truck could not stop in time. The friend was badly hurt. He died 2 weeks later.

A nephew was in prison. When he got out he went immediately to see friends. That first night they were doing drugs. My nephew overdosed and died. 

I SHOULD NOT HAVE TOSAY IT... DRUGS ARE BAD! 

Melting Teeth

When my youngest brother was little he had a problem with his teeth. They looked like acid had been dripping down them and they were melting away. They were all brown and snaggled.

The dentist would not do anything with them because they were his baby teeth. One of his favorite things to do was to brush his teeth. He said it made them feel better.

When his baby teeth fell out the new teeth were beautiful. He is still the only person I know who likes going to the dentist.

He grew up and married and had two daughters and a son. His second daughter had the same problem with her teeth. As soon as her dentist saw the buds of her new teeth start to grow he pulled her bad teeth.

Then my sister had two sons. Her youngest had the same thing with his teeth. Again his dentist advised against pulling his teeth. Poor little guy loved to brush his teeth and rinse them with a mild mouthwash. It eased the pain. 

He was a bit older when he finally lost his baby teeth. He had bald gums for several years. We thought he was never going to get his permanent teeth. The dentist said they were in there but they did not come out.

When my nephew was about ten years old the dentist said he might have to cut the gums to make it easier for his teeth to come through. Then they burst out on their own.

All of them have beautiful straight teeth now. And we still do not know why their teeth did that. 

The Black Velvet Band

I had wanted to go to an Irish Rovers concert for years. At the start I lived in an area where there were few concerts of any kind. After we moved to the big city no one wanted to go with me. It is no fun to go to a concert alone. 

Then came the year that a group were going from a local community college. They were taking a bus to the next state to see the Irish Rovers. So I decided to go.

I had not yet signed up for the trip when my daughter went into labor. She had a baby girl and I was happy to take care of my grandson and help with my new granddaughter. No Rovers for me.

About four years later I read the Irish Rovers would be nearby. I was complaining to my son (who I lived with) that no one would go with me. My granddaughter was spending the weekend with me. She immediately said she would go. I immediately ordered the tickets.

We had such a good time. After the concert the band gathers at a table to sign autographs. My granddaughter was in love.

We went to see them every year after that. 

During a concert the Irish Rovers encourage everyone to sing and clap along with them. Everyone has a good time together.

One year we were in the audience happily clapping and singing along as usual. My granddaughter leaned over and asked if she and I could trade seats. I told her of course we could so we did. Then I asked her why. 

I could see the stage well. I could hear just fine.

She told me that the woman sitting next to her told her she was making too much noise. Naturally I was angry and smoke started to come from my ears.

Instead of being nasty I very nicely leaned over to the woman. I explained that the band wanted the audience to clap and sing. I also told her that if she had a complaint about a little girl the correct way to handle it would have been to speak to me rather than rebuke a child you do not know.

The next thing I knew she was crying. She had her husband leave with her. All because she wanted to pick on a child.

By the way "Black Velvet Band" is one of my favorite songs.

To Go Or Not To Go.

My husband's aunt was a nice woman with a lot of love to give. She had been married to a man who died the same year I was married. I will call her Aunt Beenie.

Aunt Beenie had worked very hard all her life. She kept her husband comfortable for his life. He did purchase and rent two buildings. They had four apartments each. He rented them so he did have an income. They had no children.

Aunt Beenie continued to work until they made her retire. Then she managed the apartments.

Eventually she met a man. They enjoyed each other's company. 

He decided to take a few days and drive to see the sights in Colorado. Of course he invited Aunt Beenie to go along. 

She would need to pay for her own expenses. He did not have a lot of money.

Now Aunt Beenie was not rich. She did have enough to take care of herself though.

She agonized over whether or not to go. She really wanted to.

When she talked to me about it I told her that saving the money was senseless in order to not do what she really wanted to do. She would not have to scrimp and save in order to do it.

In the end she talked herself out of going. He went without her. He had a good time.

About two weeks after he returned home he suffered a heart attack and died. She could have had that nice trip with him.

My opinion is that a person should not forgo pleasures to save money that does not need to be saved. 

I Wish...

Starlight, Star bright 

First star I see tonight

I wish I may, I wish I might

Have the wish I wish tonight

It is a favorite poem to make a wish on a star. It must be the first star in the night sky or your wish will not come true. And of course you cannot tell anyone what you wished for or it will not come true.

On your birthday people make a big show of bringing you a birthday cake. On the cake are a number of candles to represent your new age. Once they are all lit you make a wish then blow out the candles. If you can blow them all out with one try your wish will come true.

When my children were little they would find "wishes" in the yard. A "wish" was what they called dandelions that have gone to seed. You make a wish and try to blow all the seeds off. If you are successful your wish will come true.

Many prayers are wishes. You ask your God to grant your wish.

Going back to the stars if you see a shooting star you can make a wish on it. If you finish the wish before the star disappears it will come true.

Raindrops on your window are fun to watch as they run down to the bottom. You can make a wish on a particular drop. If you watch it carefully your wish will come true right before it combines with another drop on its way down.

Do you have favorite wishes? 

The Friendly Clown

My mother told us stories when we were little. Her favorite was about a circus.

Once there was a circus with many animals and human acts. There was a frontwards donkey that said, "Hee-haw", a backwards donkey that said, "Haw-hee", a giraffe with a big loooong neck, an elephant with big floppy ears, a mean ferocious lion who roared and clawed at everyone, and a friendly clown.

Every morning the friendly clown would get up draw on his big red lipstick smile. Then he went to say "Good morning, Friend Donkey," the frontwards donkey. The frontwards donkey said, "Hee-Haw." Then he said, "Good morning, Friend Donkey," to the backwards donkey and the donkey would say, "Haw-hee". Next he said, Good morning, Friend  Giraffe", to the giraffe with the big looooooong neck who would bend his big looooooooooooooooooooooong neck. He moved on to the elephant with the big floppy ears and said , "Good morning, Friend Elephant," and the elephant would flap his big floppy ears. Next was the mean ferocious lion who roared and clawed at everyone. The clown with the big happy lipstick smile would go to the wagon of the mean ferocious lion who roared and clawed at everyone. The clown with the big red lipstick smile would say, "Good morning, Friend Lion." And the lion would say, "Meow/"

One morning the friendly clown woke up late. He did not have time to put on hid big red lipstick smile. So he went to say "Good morning, Friend Donkey," the frontwards donkey. The frontwards donkey said  "Hee-Haw." Then he said, "Good morning, Friend Donkey," to the backwards donkey and the donkey said, "Haw-hee". Next he said, Good morning, Friend  Giraffe", to the giraffe with the big looooooong neck bent his big looooooooooooooooooooooong neck. He moved on to the elephant with the big floppy ears and said, "Good morning, Friend Elephant." and the elephant flapped his big floppy ears. Next was the mean ferocious lion who roared and clawed at everyone. The clown with the big happy lipstick smile went to the wagon of the mean ferocious lion who roared and clawed at everyone. The clown with the big red lipstick said "Good morning, Friend Lion." The mean ferocious lion roared and clawed at the clown. The mean ferocious lion broke out of its cage and ran away.

The clown with the big red lipstick smile suddenly remembered that he was not wearing his big red lipstick smile. The mean ferocious lion was afraid. He was also mean and ferocious. They had to find him.

In order to go faster the clown with the big red smile rode the frontwards donkey who said, "Hee-haw.," until he was tired. Then he rode the backwards donkey who said, "Haw-hee," until he was tired. The clown with the big red lipstick smile rode on the giraffe with the bid loooooooomg neck. He could see much farther but he saw no mean ferocious lion. Soon the giraffe with the big long neck tired so he got on the elephant with the big floppy ears. He rode until the elephant with the big floppy ears was tired. 

They sadly went back to the circus with no mean ferocious lion.

In the morning the clown got up and put on his big red smile. Then he went to say, "Good morning, Friend Donkey," the frontwards donkey. The frontwards donkey said, "Hee-Haw." Then he said, "Good morning, Friend Donkey," to the backwards donkey and the donkey said, "Haw-hee". Next he said, Good morning, Friend  Giraffe", to the giraffe with the big looooooong neck who bent his big looooooooooooooooooooooong neck. He moved on to the elephant with the big floppy ears and said , "Good morning, Friend Elephant," and the elephant flapped his big floppy ears. Next was the mean ferocious lion who roared and clawed at everyone. He was comfortably back in his cage. The clown with the big happy lipstick smile went to the wagon of the mean ferocious lion who roared and clawed at everyone. The clown with the big red lipstick smile said, "Good morning, Friend Lion." And the lion said, "Meow/"

And all was right with the world.

Last of the Line

My youngest nephew is getting married. It is wonderful news. We also have another reason to rejoice. 

My father wanted his part of the family line to continue. Several of his children have children and so on. But none have the same last name. 

I had 4 brothers. Two of them never had children before they died. Another has a son. He has the last name. However my nephew has a daughter whose children will carry the same name as their father.

So this final nephew belongs to my youngest brother. Same last name. If he has sons they will carry the family name. My father would be happy. 

The really strange thing is that this nephew was born years after my father died. He looks so much like my father. Maybe a son would look like him. That would make it even better.

We just found out that my nephew and his wife are expecting a son!!!! Daddy would be ecstatic.

March of Dimes

When I was very young in the 1950's polio was probably the most dreaded of childhood diseases. It caused children to be crippled for life. Some were put into iron lungs which looked like medieval torture devices. Those breathed for them so they would not die. Many died anyway.

Easterseals was an organization that was known to assist polio patients. People bought the seals that looked like stamps and used them to seal letters. They also reminded parents to watch their children for signs of polio if they displayed any.

Every year around Easter there would be a drive to collect funds for Easterseals. Each of us took a small donation. I always thought it happened all over the country and they raised a lot of money. Maybe they did.

Everyone was encouraged to give at least one dine. That became the idea of calling it the March of Dimes. It became synonymous with the search for the cure of polio. 

One year someone came up with a fun idea. Mom took a strip of Scotch tape as long as me. Then we covered it with dimes from one end to the other. It must have cost my parents a fortune. Thank goodness only three of us were in school then.

Now because of the March of Dimes polio has been almost eradicated in the United States. I like to think my dimes helped.

Neighbor

 The woman across the street died.

She was older and a bit frail but she seemed to be doing fine.

Then we saw a lot of cars gathering there. That was not unusual. Her loving family gathered around her for special occasions. She was loved by her family.

The cars kept gathering for days. I thought perhaps things were not good.

Then one afternoon I heard some commotion. I knew she had died. 

The cars were no longer there in large numbers. Every once in a while someone comes. I believe they are cleaning her stuff. One of her sons lives behind her house in his own place and he comes to assist.

I like to think she lived a good life. I know she was loved by her family. That is what is important.

Mmm Mmm Good

One of the things that gives me great joy is listening to my sons exchanging recipes.

As you know I have four children... three boys and a girl. I decided when they were very young that I did not want them to marry a mommy or a daddy. My boys learned to cook simple foods and my daughter learned to change a tire.

There were rules. No one was allowed to cook on their own until they could stand flat-footed on the floor and see over the top of the stove. No one was allowed to jack up a car without someone else close by for safety.

My daughter is the youngest of the four and has a tiny body. She was quite a bit older than any of the boys were when she was allowed to cook alone. However she now works for a car dealership. She has earned bonuses and won prizes for her work. Her father would be proud. But she has never been interested in cooking.

The boys are all nice big men. They did not make any difficult meals but they would not starve if left to their own devices. As they got older they all relied on others to cook their meals. Although my youngest son has become a good baker. He makes all their Christmas cookies.

Then I had a stroke. When I came home from the hospital it was unsafe for me to use the stove. My son began to cook for us. He now is not only a good cook but he has begun experimenting a bit. He makes the best chili ever. He made his chili for his brother and gave him the recipe so he could make it for himself because he liked it so much.

Now my second son made his brother's chili and was successful. He has decided to try a few new things of his own. Just last week he sent pictures of the turkey with vegetables he had made. It was gorgeous.

Every now and then the boys will be on the phone discussing food. They talk about the best ways to season meats and how to make their vegetables. They talk about the meals they have made.

I just sit and chuckle with pleasure. 

Hope Chest

Like many teenage girls of that time I had a hope chest. A hope chest was a storage of items intended to take into a marriage. The best ones were wooden trunks. Mine was a cardboard box.

To be honest I did not think about a husband. I knew I wanted children and I would need a husband to accomplish that. Old-fashioned thinking I know but I am glad I did it that way. And I did love my husband.

I worked at odd jobs and babysitting so I had a bit of money. I mostly had practical things like cake pans, a non-stick skillet, and other items for my kitchen-to-be.

My one extravagance was a beautiful hurricane lamp. It was white with flowers tracing up the sides of the chimney. How I loved it.

I would go through my hope chest every so often to admire my possessions. And I spent a lot of time admiring my lamp. I wonder what ever happened to that lamp.

Down

 I have never been called graceful. I am a person who trips over her own feet. It is embarrassing. 

As I became older my sense of balance became a part of my clumsiness. Walking into the house I would get to the top step and become disoriented. I fell off the steps so many times. Thankfully I was never hurt.

My son got so tired of helping me up that he bought me a cane. That third leg gave me a sense of balance. It really helped me. I had been vain about using it before I got it which was so foolish.

Then a couple of years ago I had a stroke. It affected my left side. Since I am left-handed my recovery went a bit faster.

I still use a walker.  My walking gait is uneven. I can take a few steps on my own but I keep my walker or another steadying spot close. 

Unfortunately I still fall now and then. I try to be careful but sometimes it happens. At least so far I haven't been hurt. Still it is no fun.

For the most part getting myself back on my feet is the hardest part. I have to get to a place that can help me help myself. Then I have to find grips to keep myself steady.

The last time I fell I pulled the microwave (not in use at the time) on top of me. Thank goodness it was not the dishwasher because it was running.

So I am trying to be more careful. 

Competition

Last post you will remember me ranting about gambling. I am against it. At the same time I do encourage competition. It teaches one how to lose gracefully and how to win gracefully. It teaches a person to try their best and be proud of their effort.

We played board games until we wore them out. We played a lot of games with paper and pencil. We also played card games. Lots of them.

Mom never 'let' us win. If we won we knew we had really won. 

We began with easy games like Go Fish and Lay Four Out. As we grew and understood more we graduated to more difficult games. All the time Mom was teaching us the right way to play and strategy to help us win.

There were also solitaire games. Mom taught us several games we could play alone. How wise she was using a deck of cards to keep us out of her hair.

Mom taught my children to play Dungeons and Dragons. In grade school all of my children could keep track of their points and weapons. They even knew how to draw and follow maps. They even made their own games for all of them to play.

These days I relax by playing solitaire on the computer. I have about 15 games that are favorites. I even play a couple of pencil and paper games alone. It all keeps my mind busy and I have fun.

You Lose

I must first tell you I am not a gambler. I am pretty good at a game when it involves skill. If left to chance I want no part of it. I am not a lucky person.

I do like playing games. I have been playing all my life. Some require other players. Some are for one player only.

Knowing me as I do I can see a problem with slot machines. I would just know if I left the machine the next person would win my money. So I would never play the slots. 

I am strongly opposed to gambling casinos. I suppose if a person has enough extra money to consider it lost before he began to play he might enjoy gambling.

The problem I see is that too often the casinos are placed in areas where poor people live. I can picture a poor mother with $20 left and several days left before her next check. How will she feed her children? There is a good chance she will go to the casino hoping to turn her $29 into more so her kids can eat. She will lose the $20. It is a bad situation.

I am against gambling.

What Was That?

There is a perfect brown leaf blowing in front of you. Or maybe it is a nice scrap of paper. Or an empty can. What is it? It could be a fairy.

You hear an acorn falling on the roof. Or maybe a pebble hops up off the road for no apparent reason. Or a pop in the bark of the tree by your ear.  It could be a fairy.

Fairies hide behind commonplace things so we cannot see them.

A fairy is thought to be a tiny winged human-like creature. While we usually think of them as being female there are also males. They do need to perpetuate their species. Oh and they are magical beings.

There are many types of fairy. Dryad, troopers, and nymphs are but a few. Some attach themselves to things like trees. Some are warriors who fight wars. Some have trades to benefit humans like making shoes. Some are devoted to making mischief. 

There are changelings who take over a human body and live that human's life. Babies are especially vulnerable to changelings.  

Anyway fairies are all around us. We simply have to be observant enough to see them.

Spoiled

 I happily admit that I was a pampered child. My mother's family had two older babies and another was born 6 weeks after I was. But all of them were half a country away. I got all the attention that would have been shared by 4 of us.

My grandmother had small children as was common then. My youngest uncle is 3 years older than me. Even so all the aunts and uncles even the little one treated me like the most important thing in the world. Grandma and Grandpa doted on me like grandparents will do.

During World War II when my father was in the Navy, he bought kimonos for his wife and daughter. He did not even know my mother then. I was that daughter so I have always felt special because I was What Daddy wanted.

My parents were there for all of us which made us all feel so secure. We had love and attention.

One of Mom's older sisters was married. She and her husband wanted a baby but it just was not happening. So I filled an empty spot in their lives. And I loved it. 

I spent many weekends with them. I had special meals. We did fun activities. There was even a box full of toys. My favorite was a toy telephone. I remember it well.

As a quick side note my aunt had her first baby the same year I had my first baby. Life is good.

Grandpa's brother and his wife also spoiled me. We called them Uncle and Aunt. She spent the school year away because she was a teacher at a public school on one of the Indian Reservations. Still I was treated to movies and treats. 

During the summer I would sometimes stay with them. My aunt worried about me for what I thought were silly things. I slept on the couch. She would line up chairs by the couch to keep me from falling. I was around 8 years old for goodness sake.

My uncle would take me with him when they cut the hay. He never did any of the work. He hired others to do it. It was fun to watch.

Then when the cut hay dried it was time to build the stacks. My uncle hired Indians from the local tribe for that job. I was fascinated listening to them talking to each other in their native language. I am sure they were talking about how cheap my uncle was.

These are only a few of the people who made me feel special. I am happy. 

Sew Sew

 I do not sew. When I was a child my mother taught me to do embroidery which I also cannot do.

We had a sewing machine. It was the old kind operated by a treadle made by pumping it with your feet. I often used it to repair clothing. 

I also attempted to make clothes using it. I would be pumping the treadle and picking up a little speed when suddenly I made a mistake. I am naturally a calm and collected person. But I have been known to throw a tantrum and rip the cloth from the machine. The needle attached to the machine would come with it.

At school the 7th grade girls were required to take one semester of home economics. We learned to wash our hair, change our underwear daily, and arrange cut flowers. They also taught us to make a cake from scratch. Then we had to make a skirt.

The pattern for the skirt was simple. We cut a circle from our material then made a waist with a zipper.

 When I finished by hemming the skirt one side was at my ankle. The other side was just below my hip. How did that happen?

My 3 sons and my daughter all take care of mending their own clothes. My stitches do not hold. 

My mother, both of my sisters, and my daughter could all sew. It is not fair. But I am really good at changing my underwear.