Tuesday, July 3, 2018
Not Just A Girl
I have always been grateful to my parents because they never, not one time, told me there was anything I could not do because I was a girl. I was encouraged to try anything (as long as it was fairly safe) and praised when I tried.
My grandmother used to tell me that after I became fourteen years old I would no longer be able to 1. wear shorts, 2. tie my fathers shirt at the waist when I wore it, 3. go barefoot, and a variety of other nonsense. My parents didn't directly contradict her to me. They only showed me by example that I could do whatever I felt I had the capability to do.
Naturally I was considered a tomboy because I liked playing with the boys. But I liked to play dress-up and have tea parties too. Naturally I got into a lot of trouble too.
As it is with a lot of large families some of my aunts and uncles were very close in age to me. I followed them all over the place. A couple of my brothers were there too.
The boys decided it was a fun thing to catch snakes. Not to be outdone I caught snakes too. It wasn't until much later that I realized I had caught all the snakes. Those boys were as scared as I was but I was the one stupid enough to show them that I was not afraid.
Volleyball was the acceptable sport for girls in the schools I attended. One school I went to had a really good volleyball team. I loved playing there. Our team was undefeated for several years. That included tournament games. We were good.
I played softball and football with the boys. Not at school. That would not have been allowed. I went to one school where the boys and girls even entered the building through separate doors, for goodness sake. No fraternizing with the opposite S.E.X. To this day I have not figured out how several of the girls got pregnant (pardon me, became with child) under those circumstances.
When I was in high school I took courses to prepare me for college. I had English classes, science classes, math classes, civics classes, swimming, pep club, chorus, band, modern dance, gymnastics, and team sports. It looks like a lot when I look at the list but it was spread over several years.
The one class I was not able to take was calculus. Why not, you might well ask? Does being a girl sound familiar? I was a girl and what on earth would a girl ever need with calculus? I was shocked. I had never been restricted in that way before. I went to the proper authorities but they all had the same opinion. So I do not have calculus on my resume.
So, well before Women's Lib became a cause my parents let me follow my interests no matter what other people thought should limit me because I was female. I am thankful every day that they allowed me to become a strong individual.
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I remember that in elementary school the boys sat on one side of the classroom and the girls on the other side. Maybe so no one could get pregnant during school hours?
ReplyDeleteI went to an all boys high school, so for the longest time girls seemed very strange to me.
The school that had separate entrances had an invisible line between them outside. When it was nice enough to eat outside at lunch the boys stayed on one side and the girls on the other. Couples sat next to each other on the proper side of the line. Oddly enough those of us who rode the bus entered and exited by a side door males and females alike. And all classes were co-ed. Adults often do not make sense.
DeleteYou had very wide parents who were ahead of their time, Emma, and thankfully so for you. However, I would not have tried to catch snakes and certainly not trhe most of anyone else.
ReplyDeleteI never said I was wise. I did a lot of dumb things.
DeleteI only had one grandmother living, and she supported me as much as did my parents. It was a good childhood.
ReplyDeleteI am glad you did. It shows.
DeleteWhen I was 35 my grandmother mentioned to me that it might be time to get my hair cut short. I did, to make her happy. I still regret getting it cut.
ReplyDeleteI always take suggestions under advisement but ultimately do what I think is right. I am sure your grandmother meant well.
DeleteYour calculus experience makes me think of a man at the post office. I was going around town after high school, walking of course. I went in the post office to inquire about whether they were hiring. I was 17. He counseled me how they hired and their preference for veterans who were male. He said that there was no way a woman would ever be hired.
ReplyDeleteWithin ten years, the post office was full of women. Our mail delivery person is a woman.
People can be so silly. Why put anyone into a pigeonhole? They might be missing the best option.
DeleteAt the Baptist college Peggy attended from '68 to '72, the only place that shorts were allowed was in PE and on the tennis court, but she had to wear a dress to get there. Whereas the boys had no curfew, the girls had to be in by 10:00, except on weekends when they could stay out an extra hour.
ReplyDeleteI don't know the extent to which my mother would have told my sister that she couldn't do certain things because she was a girl, but I would give good odds that my father never did.
You just ignited a memory of those awful gym suits we had to wear. They were one piece that snapped up to the neck. The shorts had a cuff that was ever so attractive she says dripping sarcasm. Ours were supposed to be mint green but the color was off more than a little. I am now shuddering.
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