Let's All Go To The Lobby

My children were all in school but still fairly young. My husband found an old 8 mm movie projector. No movies just the projector. And it worked.

As luck would have it the local library had a section of old 8 mm movies. The selection was not huge but adequate.

In the summer we would set up outside. There was a body shop on the other side of our neighbors. It had a white wall that was perfect for showing the movies.

Everyone was invited. Blankets were spread on the lawns and popcorn was plentiful. The children loved it.

One of my favorite movies was I Know An Old Lady Who Swallowed A Fly. It was a cartoon of one of my favorite silly songs. It begins with:


I know an old lady who swallowed a fly,
I don't know why she swallowed the fly,
Perhaps she'll die.

A new critter was added to the list.

 I know an old lady who swallowed a spider,
That wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her.
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly,
I don't know why she swallowed the fly,
Perhaps she'll die.

With each new animal the rest of the song was repeated after. Finally there is a long list of animals and a reason why they were swallowed.

I know an old lady who swallowed a cow,
I wonder how she swallowed a cow?!
She swallowed the cow to catch the goat,
She swallowed the goat to catch the dog,
She swallowed the dog to catch the cat,
She swallowed the cat to catch the bird,
She swallowed the bird to catch the spider,
That wriggled and jiggled and tickled inside her,
She swallowed the spider to catch the fly,
I don't know why she swallowed the fly,
Perhaps she'll die.

The song ends with

I know an old lady who swallowed a horse,
She's dead, of course!!

I think the movie version included a pig in there somewhere but this is the official version. You can find it on YouTube by various artists. My favorite is by Burl Ives. Click on the link if you would like to hear it.

We spent many warm summer nights with our friends and family watching movies on the lawn. It does not take a lot of money to have a good time.

Take This

I know you have been waiting for me to rant again. I am happy to oblige.

My beef today is about commercials for drugs on television. I understand that the drug companies are in business to make money. It is the American way. But why on earth are they advertising medications that I need to have prescribed by a doctor?

When I go to the doctor I expect him to know what medications are needed for my condition. Pretend I am not feeling well and I see the doctor and tell him that these are my symptoms and this is the medicine I wish to have him prescribe. If he says fine and writes out the script I think I need to find another doctor.

The commercials for these drugs make them sound like they will cure all ills. Until the end of the commercial. That is when the announcer begins to list the side effects. Do not drive or operate heavy equipment. Dizziness, nausea, constipation, diarrhea, joint pain, and muscle cramping. Depression, anxiety, suicidal urges. Hair loss, weight gain, weight loss, water retention.

Shortness of breath, rapid heart beat, rise in blood pressure, nose bleeds. Watery eyes, runny nose, dry mouth. May cause seizures, kidney failure, DEATH. I think you get the idea.

I have seen commercials for drugs to combat depression and the side effects include depression and suicidal tendencies. What!?! Then there are those that tell you they are absolutely safe to take so you can work then say to be careful because they may cause drowsiness.

You may wonder why the announcer lists all the things that could go wrong if a person takes a particular drug. They are required by law to do so. Another reason to have a doctor advise you about what medications you should take.

A competent doctor can also monitor what medications you are taking and how they will interact with any new prescriptions. The doctor will also explain what to expect from the new drug, what it will do, and any good effects or bad effects to watch for.

I am sick of hearing about bodily functions. Some things are not subjects for polite conversation. I do not wish to hear about whether your sexual equipment is working. I do not wish to know if you are constipated or suffering from diarrhea. I do not wish to know about your cold or flu.

I do not wish to know about your hemorrhoids. I do not wish to know about your period or PMS. I do not wish to know about your toenail fungus. I do not wish to know about your vaginal infection. I do not wish to know about your clogged tear ducts.

I know that people have these problems. I sympathize. I really do. They are not things to be ashamed of. I just feel that they are not my business.

My final gripe is my newest. I recently noticed that the commercials are giving "cutesy" names to chronic diseases. Sudden;y hepatitis C has become "HepC". Sounds like such a fun disease.

To promote their drug the may have a person with a sexy voice inform you that your Chronic Blue Tongue Fungus is known as CBTF. I feel like they are trying to let you know that you have joined a country club. Your CBTF is not a life-threatening disease but a "really cool" condition. Everybody wants one.

Of course if you have CBTF you want to have the most "in" drug to treat it. Then you will have the best social life, the most loving family, and the most successful job. CBTF is such a good condition to have.

They are not allowed to advertise tobacco products these days. Liquor commercials are supposed to be limited to times that children are not watching television. Please tell me why they are allowed to air the drug commercials.

Ray Stevens has a cute song called "There Must Be A Pill For This". If you click on the link you can hear it.

Leave A Christmas Treat

We all know enough to leave a snack for Santa on Christmas Eve. He works hard all night to deliver gifts to good girls and boys. Cookies and milk are what we always leave out for Santa.

Did you ever consider that the reindeer are working hard too? They are able to eat snow so they need nothing to drink but I have a recipe for Magic Reindeer Food that the children can spread outside before going to bed. It makes the reindeer so happy.

MAGIC REINDEER FOOD

In a small zipper food storage bag or empty shaker container, mix:
1/2 cup uncooked oatmeal
1/2 cup sugar
1/4 cup red or green sugar crystals (as used for cake decorating)

Package Magic Reindeer food in small food storage bags or holiday gift bags.

Now that you have made the magic reindeer food, the rest is easy. Before the children go to bed and have visions of sugar plums dancing in their heads, let them run outside and sprinkle the magic reindeer food around the yard. Away from the house might be good. Santa's reindeer like a little space.

After gifts have been opened in the morning, everyone can take a look to see if the food was eaten.

Are we done? Nope. We still have to thank the elves who help Santa all year. Let's make some Elf Donuts.

You will need a box of Cheerios, some small tubes of frosting (the more colors the better), sprinkles, and perhaps cinnamon sugar mixture. Perhaps you like chocolate, powdered sugar, peanut butter, or Nutella. Anything you might use to decorate normal sized donuts.

Squeeze a bit of frosting onto a Cheerio. If you wish then you can dip it into a bit of the sprinkles or maybe colored sugar. Or you can leave it plain.

Place the Elf Donuts on a saucer or in plastic sandwich bags. The sandwich bags might make them easier for Santa to take to the North Pole.

Now we have a happy Santa, reindeer, and elves. And these are projects that require little supervision for the children to stay busy on that last day before Christmas.

A Little Bit Of Luck

As you know I like music. I especially like music that makes me feel good. Good luck makes everyone happy.

There are many songs dealing with luck. I am going to share a few of my favorites.

Lucky Lady Bug by Billie and Lillie mentions a whole bunch of good luck tokens and is a fun little ditty. The Four Seasons also sang this song.

Good Luck Charm by Elvis Presley begs us to be his good luck charm.

Happy Go Lucky Me has at least two good versions. I am more familiar with Paul Evans as the singer but George Formby's version is excellent.

Lucky Old Sun has been done by many artists but I like Frankie Laine the best.

Some Guys Have All The Luck by Rod Stewart is a plaintive song about the need for love.

Lucky Star by Madonna has a happier result in the love department.

Lucky Man by Emerson, Lake, and Palmer has a pretty melody. It was written by Greg Lake when he was 12 years old. The Verve did a different song named Lucky Man as did Montgomery Gentry. All are good songs.

Superstition by Stevie Wonder cautions against relying on luck whether it is good or bad.

Ain't That A Kick In The Head has been recorded by so many but the singers I think of are Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin.

Luck Be A Lady Tonight always brings a picture of Frank Sinatra to my mind.

Ace In The Hole by George Strait tells us that we must use our luck wisely and not give away what we have.

The Gambler by Kenny Rogers gives the same message by telling us that we have to know what we are doing to make luck work for us.

Lady Luck Blues by Bessie Smith is heart-wrenching with her pining for a lost love.

With A Little Luck by  Paul McCartney & Wings assures his girl that with a little luck they can make their relationship work.

Lucky Young by Boris Yeltsin reminds us to notice the luck that comes our way.

Lucky by Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat is just a sweet love song.

The Lucky One by Amy Grant is a light-hearted love song.

From A Jack To A King by Ned Miller does not use the word luck but it talks about being lucky in love.

Lucky Devil by Carl Dobkins Jr tells of him being a lucky devil to find an angel to love.

You Are My Lucky Star has been done by so many singers. I think my favorite is Debbie Reynolds in Singin In The Rain.

Lucky Song by Dean Martin is another song that makes me feel happy.

Lucky Me by Anne Murray is a sad song about a person who is waiting for her luck to find love for her.

Lucky Me by the Chiffons tells us that this girl is happy to be lucky in love.

Lucky In Love by Mick Jagger shows that even though he is not lucky elsewhere he is lucky with love.

Lucky Arms by Lefty Frizzell is another song about a person who is not lucky with anything else but he is lucky in love


There are a lot more lucky songs. These are some of my favorites. You can find them on YouTube if you are interested. I hope all of your luck is good.

Tilly T Wonderdog

My children have a knack for unusual names for their pets. Especially the dogs. Today you will learn about Tilly T (T stands for The) Wonderdog.

It was a lovely spring day and I was visiting a friend. We sat on the front porch talking and enjoying the weather.

His neighbor brought out a little puppy and tied it to a stake in their front yard. She left no water even though it was a warm day. When she went inside her small children came out.

As children often do these little "angels" were being cruel to the poor puppy. They tormented it and then began poking it with sticks.

I knocked on their door to let the mother know what was happening to the poor puppy. She did not seem too concerned.

Then she told me she would probably take it to the pound because it was too much work. That was when I offered to take it home with me.

The little guy was cute. Because it happened to be my oldest son's birthday he claimed the dog as his.

And the little boy puppy turned out to be a little girl puppy. She probably was just barely old enough to be away from her mother. She still had several milk teeth.

My son said he always wanted a dog that he could give a good life to. As you know many pets do not get to stay with their families because they die early or run away. My son intended for this not to happen with her.

Naming her was a process. He wanted to name her after his previous dog Attila Thor Doberhound. I suggested Tilly as a derivative of Attila. Tilly it was. The rest of her name came as she grew into it.

Tilly was a normal puppy. As her new teeth began to come in she chewed. And chewed. And chewed. Then she kept on chewing after she had her teeth.

What upset me was that it was always my things she chewed. I would come in the door and see the evidence.

I was stunned that my daughter's love birds, who picked up several words and noises, did not say "Damned dog!" because it seemed like that was what I said every time I came in.

I once went on a trip. My luggage was leather. When I came home I was tired and did not immediately unpack. After a bit of rest I had to report to my job.

When I came home from work I found that she had chewed a hole in my suitcase to get to my shoes. She took one she from each of two pair and chewed them. The shoes were new and worn only once. The shoes and the suitcase were ruined. Damned dog!

It took a couple of years before she stopped chewing.

Then she became a lady. She had a delicate face and such a pretty blonde blonde color. She was medium sized.

Tilly was gentle and even tempered. However she did not like children up close.

She was happy when my grandchildren came to visit. She would greet them at the door, wagging her whole back half. Then she would retreat to a safe place so they could not try to play with her. Perhaps somewhere in her memory she remembered being poked with a stick.

Tilly took great pride in being a dog. She did not wish to be one of us. She loved us and we were hers but she knew she was a bit better than a human.

Tilly ate her dog food. She did not want table scraps. (How common!) My son would sometimes try to give a piece of his hamburger if we had fast food. She would reject it unless he forced her. Then she would take her little piece away from our sight and then grudgingly eat it. She did not like to eat in front of us.

We could have left a raw steak out in front of her and she would not even have sniffed it. It was beneath her.

We had gone to Wendy's to get fast food one day. Of course we had to have frostys  too. A frosty is similar to a shake or a malt. It is thick with ice cream. It has a bit of chocolate flavor and I think perhaps a bit of malt powder.

We ate in front of the television. I sat my frosty on the floor next to my leg as I ate and talked.

I was telling a story and reveling in the amusement my children were showing. They were chuckling and their eyes shone with glee. They usually sat and acted as if I were boring them. I was in heaven.

To catch my breath I reached down for my frosty. Imagine my shock at finding the frosty with Tilly's nose in it! She was stealing my frosty! That was what my children found so funny.
Of course we all began to laugh out loud. Tilly polished off the whole thing. Which was good because I no longer wanted it.
We also discovered that she liked cherry flavored Hall's cough drops. My son kept them on a shelf next to his bed. He had to put them in a safer place because she would eat them all and they were not really good for her.

My son also kept money on the shelf next to his bed. One day after work he came to me from his room laughing. He had walked in to find the dog had pulled all his currency onto the bed and was rolling in it much the same way a dog rolls in the grass. The money had to be put somewhere else too.

We had cats at the same time that Tilly came to live with us. There was a window they liked to lie in and sun themselves while taking a nap. Tilly thought it looked like a good idea so she began to do the same.

The problem started when she grew too large to relax there. She would fall asleep and fall to the floor. No more naps in the window for her.

Another thing Tilly could do was identify a $20 bill. Any other denomination could be presented and she did a big "ho-hum" and ignored it. To her a $20 bill meant we had ordered pizza. She would jump up and down and get all excited. The thing is that she never ate pizza. She got to terrorize the delivery boy. She was happy.

To say the word bath in front of Tilly was cause for her to begin to shiver with fear. She would act like someone was ready to beat her. I do not know why. When my son would get her in the tub she did not want to come out. She loved the water and loved to swim.

My youngest son looked like my youngest brother. Tilly was on her chain one day when my brother came to visit. Tilly went running up happily to greet my son.

When my brother spoke to her she turned angrily and growled and lunged at him. By his voice and his smell she knew he was not my son. I think she was angry because she had been deceived.

Tilly began to walk in circles through the house. She would walk to the front door then back through the hall to the bathroom over and over. When she was so exhausted she had to sleep she would lie down. As soon as she woke she started to pace again.

We took her to the vet. The vet said that Tilly had a lesion on her brain that caused the compulsive pacing. There was nothing to do to control it. Eventually she would have to be put down.

When would be time to do that? The vet said we would know.

Tilly began to have seizures. Because of my epilepsy my children and I know what to do during and after a seizure. We tried to make her as comfortable as possible.

We had taken Tilly with us to a new park we found several times. There was a small lake there for swimming. Dogs were allowed. She loved it there.

She kept getting worse. We went to the park for a family outing and took Tilly along. When she got out of the car she took off dragging my son behind her. She went directly to the water. She swam all afternoon.

That was the last good day Tilly had. A few nights later she began seizing repeatedly. My son told me to call the vet which I did. But she stopped seizing and my son could not bring himself to take her.

The following morning she was worse. My son held her as I drove to the vet. He cried because he knew he was losing her.

The vet was sympathetic. She said it was time. She gave Tilly an injection and in seconds it was over. We were given a box of tissues and as much tim as we needed to be with Tilly. We used the whole box.

Tilly was a wonderful dog. She appreciated us as her pets. Best of all my son had given her a long and happy life.

I Must Be Dreaming

I am an escapist. No, I cannot do magic. I escape in my mind.

I can get lost in the story of a book. I feel like I am watching a Civil War battle when I read about Robert E Lee's life. In Wuthering Heights I get caught up in the love, unrequited love, revenge, and all other angst. Nancy Drew has taken me on so many adventures. I especially loved the old aunt who could not perform any duties because she "has a bone in her foot".

Children appreciate a good story. Green Eggs And Ham takes us on a merry trip. Sam I Am is convinced he would not like green eggs and ham no matter what. In the end he tries it and discoveres to the delight of all the he actually likes them. All he had to do was try them.

Fantasy stories are so much fun. I can accompany characters who accept magic as an everyday happening. Mythical animals abound. Other worlds are explored.

Movies are the same. I watch a lot of my favorite movies on television. It is not the same even with surround sound.

In the theater with the lights lowered and the sound all around me I become one with the movie. I usually see movies that I do not have to think about. I simply want to be entertained. For that reason I like musicals.

A lot of people grimace at the thought of a musical. The plots are often a love story. The songs are about love gained or lost. The dances are colorful and lively. Seven Brides For Seven Brothers is loosely based on The Rape of the Sabine Women. The brothers kidnap young brides for themselves and whisk them away to their remote ranch.

By spring when the families of the women were able to rescue them the women had fallen in love with the kidnappers. It all provides the opportunity for songs and dances. It is light-hearted for the most part. I sit at the edge of the action watching.

Indiana Jones takes me on adventures all over the world. His stories are about real ideas and I see real landmarks. There is a lot of action and suspense. And I am a part of it.

Disney full feature cartoons take me to a fantasy land. They are full of imaginary creatures. They are colorful and end happily.

Now I return to real live action.

My husband drove a truck. It was owned by a man who owned a bar. On Fridays we would go to the bar to pick up my husband's paycheck. There was a Mexican buffet so we would usually eat too.

We were sitting at a table with my husband's brother and his wife and enjoying the Mariachi band. My brother-in-law had gone to the restroom. The place was busy as it always was on Fridays.

Suddenly a man in a white shirt came running from across the dance floor (the direction of the restrooms). He ran up and over our table!

My husband thought it was his brother who was wearing a white shirt. He ran after the men chasing the white shirt to protect his brother. My sister-in-law immediately ran to stand next to the wall out of the way of any action.

There were people hitting each other all around our table. Tables and chairs were knocked over.

Where was I? Sitting in my chair watching the action. It was so unreal that I felt like I was at the movies.

My sister-in-law ran over and grabbed my arm and pulled me to the wall. At close to the same time our table was toppled.

My brother-in-law came out of the restroom to the whole scene. When he found out that my husband was in the tangle of bodies he went to join the fray.

Eventually the fight was over and tables righted and chairs put back in place. We sat down to recover a bit before we left. I thanked my sister-in-law for saving me from being hurt.

I guess my escapism is not always a blessing.

Early Morning Call

My phone rang early this morning. I had no idea what time it was because I was sound asleep.

Because of my seizures I do not ump up out of bed for anything. Bad consequences have taught me to get up more slowly.

I heard my daughter's voice on the voice mail so as soon as I could muster myself I got up and called her back. When I looked at the clock I saw that it was a couple minutes after 6:00.

My grandson, who is 19, is in the hospital.

They had their Thanksgiving dinner yesterday because it was the first day he would have off work and they wanted to celebrate as a family. But my grandson did not feel well. Instead of eating he stayed on the couch groaning.

He has always had a problem with constipation. He is supposed to take something every day to ease the problem but as with most young people he is not diligent about it.

He did not say anything but he did take a laxative to see if that would help. There were a couple of other things he tried. He still felt worse and worse.

My daughter kept asking him (as all of us who are mothers do) if he needed to see a doctor. He did not know. He ust knew he was in pain.

Finally his parents took him to the emergency room of the hospital. It was a Saturday and the doctor's office was closed.

After asking a lot of questions and a few tests it was determined that his appendix would need to be removed. It had not burst but it needed to come out sooner rather than later.

The hospital called in the necessary team to do the surgery.

Shortly before 6:00 the doctor came out to tell my daughter and son-in-law that the surgery was over and successful. As soon as my grandson was out of recovery they could see him.

He also said that at some point between the time they decided to do surgery and the surgery itself my grandson's appendix had burst. They were certain that there would be no complications because of that but he will be in the hospital until they are sure.

As I was talking to my daughter the nurse came to let them know that my grandson was being moved to his room and they could see him in a few minutes.

I know that he will be sleeping most of the day so I will wait until tomorrow to talk to him. Thank goodness it is a good outcome.